“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”
Jeremiah 29:13 ESV
One of my favourite songs from the 1980s was “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” by U2. I memorised the lyrics and played the song in my mind many times. I still like the song, but upon closer examination of the lyrics, it reveals a person searching for something that he has tried to find everywhere, but to no avail. Then, one part struck me:
You broke the bonds, and you loosed the chains,
carried the cross, of my shame,
Oh my shame, you know, I believe it,
But I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.
The lyrics allude to someone finding Jesus in his life, but it was still not enough. Even after finding Jesus, there was something else he needed to find. The lyrics above challenged me about my life – what am I looking for? Have I found it? They brought me back to my teenage years when I made an adult decision to follow Jesus.
I was a very selfish, greedy, and ambitious man. I wanted to be rich and famous regardless of the cost and who I stepped on. I imagined what cars and houses I wanted to have. I wanted to become a young millionaire, wealthy and famous wherever I went. I would have been a very happy and satisfied man if I had reached all these dreams. These were the things I was looking for. Instead, Jesus came into my life and radically altered my goals and outlook in life. It was a 180-degree change. I surrendered all my earthly plans and ambitions because I saw the Pearl of Great Price, the one for which I am willing to exchange everything. My life has never been the same.
There was peace and joy in my life searching for riches that do not spoil, rust or be stolen. Of course, it was not easy. The world still provides promises, although empty. The flesh within battles constantly with my desire to love and follow God. The devil continuously entices me to settle for something less than what I have with God. I can now change the lyrics above to my liking:
You broke the bonds, and you loosed the chains,
carried the cross, of my shame,
Oh my shame, You know, I believe it,
But now, I’ve finally found what I’m looking for.
Jesus is the one I am looking for.
Reflecting further, the song’s original lyrics seem to make sense to people around me. I have been involved in many retreats and youth camps, but unfortunately, many have strayed away from the faith. How can I explain that? What is going on? I believe many people who have had a genuine conversion experience were blinded and carried away by the same enemies I face daily – the world, the flesh and the devil. They have either not appreciated the Pearl of Great Price or never known the value of what they had. The world that we live in is deceitful and enticing in its values and promises. Unfortunately, these people are searching for something that can only be answered by finding God. The longing in our hearts is by design by God. God created us, and that longing in that heart is built in us for God to satisfy. Nothing else can fill that longing.
Every human being is born with a longing for God, whether they know it or not. Our purpose of existence is beyond the temporal. We are created by God and for God. We are made in His image with the capacity to know, love, and serve Him. This is our highest potential – it is not maximising our talents, nor becoming rich and famous, nor anything else temporal. We were made to be with God forever.
How about you – have you found what you are looking for? Maybe the better question is: Have you found the reason for your existence?
“The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up. Then, in his joy, he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field.”
Matthew 13:44 (ESV)
This is Tom Caballes’ last published reflection before he passed to the Lord on December 22, 2025.
Top image credit: Man seeking God with all his heart, by © Kevin Carden, from ChristianPhotoshops.com. Used with permission.
Tom Caballes was a National Coordinator of the Lamb of God, a community of the Sword of the Spirit with seven branches located throughout New Zealand. Tom lived with his wife Mhel and their two daughters [with his son-in-law and grand-daughter] in Wellington, New Zealand.