Responding to God’s Design

Introduction

This article is meant to be a beginning of a response to God’s Design for young men, fatherhood, family life and Christian leadership. It is also a follow-up to an earlier article on “The Dreaded Patriarchy”. 

When we step back from the Lord’s prayer, we see that, as with the Ten Commandments, it has two main parts: 1) addressing God the Father, and 2) prayers for our well-being. 

• Part one: May God’s name be respected and praised; may God’s kingdom come and his will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
• Part two: May we (not just me) have forgiveness, safe direction, and deliverance.

To begin to respond to God’s design I plan to focus on one sentence in Part 1, “thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.”

It is within each person’s ability to contribute to the coming of the kingdom of God on earth. As we repeatedly pray that prayer, it is not uncommon to miss our personal responsibility to usher in the kingdom of God. I believe that when we knowingly submit to God’s will, the seeds are planted for the kingdom of God on earth. 

In the past, we used to think that God was roaming the earth trying to catch someone in sin that he could punish. Actually, I believe that he is mostly searching for people who desire to subordinate their will to his… people that he can build with… people that want to see “his kingdom come, his will be done on earth as it is in heaven.”

Two Kinds of Smart Christians

There are at least two kinds of smart Christians: 1) those who have studied the Word of God, searching and finding God’s design, and 2) those who have searched and found God’s design and are trying to live it out. This second set is smart, but also wise. Their lamps are full and waiting for the return of the king!

He who has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me; and he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.” Judas (not Iscariot) said to him, “Lord, how is it that you will manifest yourself to us, and not to the world?” Jesus answered him, “If a man loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. He who does not love me does not keep my words; and the word which you hear is not mine but the Father’s who sent me.

John 14:21-24

But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who observes his natural face in a mirror;for he observes himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But he who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer that forgets but a doer that acts, he shall be blessed in his doing.

James 1:22-25

I think the Lord is searching for those who hear about God’s design and then set out to intentionally live God’s design. 

The search: 

I am writing to you, little children, because your sins are forgiven for his sake. I am writing to you, fathers, because you know him who is from the beginning. I am writing to you, young men, because you have overcome the evil one. I write to you, children, because you know the Father. I write to you, fathers, because you know him who is from the beginning. I write to you, young men, because you are strong, and the word of God abides in you, and you have overcome the evil one.

1 John 2:12-14

Two Things

Before we consider responding to God’s design in our roles, it is helpful to consider two things:

1. We should explore everything that the word of God has to say about our roles and embrace them as one would embrace a mission statement or a handbook.
2. You may not find a satisfying list of instructions for your particular role but be aware that the major dispositions and instructions for a good Christian life provide the personal foundation and basis for the various roles to which we are called. 

“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which the Lord your God gives you.

Exodus 20:12

Most of the commandments are expressed as what not to do. Children are blessed with their own positive commandment that comes with a promise: “…that your days may be long…”

Generally speaking, life is better when we honor our parents and dishonoring our parents can be dangerous. 

What does it mean to honor our parents? 

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “…that it may be well with you and that you may live long on the earth.”

Ephesians 6:1-3

Obedience is one of the primary ways of honoring our parents and later in life: teachers, supervisors, policemen, pastors, and the Lord himself.

Our obedience to the Lord honors him and lays the foundation for fear of the Lord. 

Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

Colossians 3:20

Courtship

As children of our parents, most of us will enter adulthood and pursue marriage and parenting. Approaching courtship with a foundational knowledge and respect for God’s Design could be one of the wisest, most faithful things you could ever do. If, as a young person, you have come to a deep love of the Lord, you will want to have a family that is dedicated to him and pleasing to him.

 As a sophomore in high school, I took a course called “Christian Family”. Many Christian principles were presented to us and many of them remain with me to this day. One of the most impacting was this: “Do not date a girl you would not want to marry!” For me, it gave a new weight to my approach to dating and courtship. It warned me that dating could lead to a relationship that might not support my long-term expectations for my life and family. In our marriage preparation class, the pastor said to me, “You think you’re going to have the best marriage ever, right?” I said, “That’s the plan!” Both my wife and I come from rough family backgrounds, and we were determined to do better. 

I have seen many young people enter into marriage where they are unable to form a strong Christian family. The family often does not look any different than those around them. Career-centered, education-centered, upwardly mobile, etc. So, my advice is this: “Enter into a courtship with someone whom you can have a Christ-centered marriage and family.” 

Fathers

And if you be unwilling to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the river, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell; but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

Joshua 24:15 

Fathers, as with Joshua, have a vision for a Christ-centered marriage and lead your family into it. 

And you shall teach them to your children, talking of them when you are sitting in your house, and when you are walking by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.  

Deuteronomy 11:19

Always be ready to grow their knowledge and understanding for the Lord and his nature.

No, for I have chosen  him, that he may charge his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing righteousness and justice; so that the Lord may bring to Abraham what he has promised him.”

Genesis 18:19

Again, have vision and lead your family into it. Learn God’s Design and commit yourself to it. 

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4

Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.

Colossians 3:24

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word…  

Ephesians 5:25-26

This is one of the most important Scriptures that a husband and father could hear. 

For a husband, it presents a unique relationship in which we can respond to one of Jesus’ last requests: 

“Love one another as I have loved you.”

John 15:12b

As a father: the marriage relationship provides for you a place in which you can model Christianity for your children.

Leaders

The New Testament is filled with lessons for Christian teachers. I would like to identify the letters to Timothy as a great resource. The Old Testament Scriptures above for fathers apply also to Christian leaders. 

Where there is no vision the people cast off restraint, but blessed is he who keeps the law.

Proverbs 29:18

People need a vision. Leaders need to know what the vision is, and present is on a regular basis. 

The saying is sure: If anyone aspires to the office of bishop, he desires a noble task. Now a bishop must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, sensible, dignified, hospitable, an apt teacher,no drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, and no lover of money.He must manage his own household well, keeping his children submissive and respectful in every way;for if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how can he care for God’s church? He must not be a recent convert, or he may be puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil;moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders, or he may fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.

1 Timothy 3:1-7 

If you have chaos and disorder in your home and personal life you should not be appointed to leadership in the body of Christ. I mentioned earlier that some of the Old Testament scriptures for fathers can be applied to Christian leaders. The above verse for leaders may be applied to and give advice for fathers, as well. 

…for if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how can he care for God’s church?

1 Timothy 3:4b

“Keeping his children submissive and respectful in every way”: what a novel concept! But also, how archaic! Most fathers fall back in disbelief. It seems impossible, but professors can do it. High school coaches can do it. Yet most fathers recoil from that expectation. It’s clearly part of God’s design, no matter what the social sciences teach. 

A father is strict but not too strict and has good order in his personal and family life. Candidates for Christian leaders can come from that group.

Families

In embracing God’s Design, families should together pore over God’s word to discover and embrace his plan. Doing so, helps to welcome the Kingdom of God on earth. We answer that phrase in the Lord’s Prayer by rejecting the secular model of family life and embracing God’s design for family life.

We can all work together to discover and to implement his will for us. One element is to take seriously the honoring and celebrating the Lord’s Day (perhaps the most ignored commandment). 

One exercise during the celebration could be identifying one aspect of God’s design for family life and discussing or working it in the next week during dinner or at family prayer time.

As we grow in embracing God’s design for our family life, we are answering the prayer “…thy kingdom come, they will be done on earth as it is in heaven.”

Leadership Groups

Churches and communities that hope to live a Bible-based expression of God’s design have a noble vision. Their leadership groups need to address the decline in fatherhood, masculinity, and family life, which is increasingly secular in form and expression. 

God’s design is “plan A” and we are increasingly embracing “plan B”: nominal Christianity. 

Many groups need an overall strategy to address this issue. That strategy might include:

• strengthening fathers in their role;
• courses, retreats, men’s nights, or support groups that empower fathers;
• a strategy for the young: a coherent plan that places God’s design in the eyes of the young (courses, retreats, summer camp, youth days);
• community-wide strategy to renew the vision for Christian family life.

Conclusion

We cannot have robust Christian community or church life without robust Christian families committed to living out God’s design!

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• See related articles by Bob Tedesco: The Dreaded Patriarchy: Part 1, and Part 2 “Isms”

Top image credit: Illustration of a dad and his two teenage sons sitting in their living room for a Bible reading together. Image created with digital paintbrush and AI enhanced artwork from © Artstyles.com. Used with permission.