Person to Person: A
practical approach to effective
evangelism
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Personal
Evangelism: Part 3
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Be Open -
Be Natural
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by Jim Berlucchi
I once heard a comment
that accurately reflected the attitude that
many Christians have about sharing their
faith. It came from a dedicated young
Christian woman who has had some success in
evangelism. She said, “For years I was afraid
of turning people off by aggressive
evangelism. I was afraid of people’s bad
opinion of me. But now I find nearly 90
percent of the people I try to speak to about
God will readily talk to me. Those who don’t
are free to say so, and we talk about
something else. Often, listening to them, then
becomes important.”
The foundation stone for
everyday evangelism seems so simple and
apparent that it hardly justifies mentioning.
Yet many Christians don’t realize that they
can reach others in their daily environments
simply by being open and natural about their
Christianity. A simple willingness and
readiness to share with others about our
Christian lives is an essential ingredient in
personal evangelism. This readiness differs
from an aggressive showiness or pushy
spiritual artificiality. Rather I am talking
about the kind of openness which allows us to
speak of the different aspects of our
Christian lives naturally, as opportunities
arise.
My dictionary lists
sixteen definitions of the noun open and many
fittingly describe this disposition, so
important to effective personal evangelism.
Consider, for instance: “uncovered or
unprotected; exposed; not enclosed. Not secret
or disguised; revealed; public. Without
reserve or practice; frank, accessible.”
I particularly noted the
phrase “exposed, not enclosed.” How often it
seems that many Christians are decidedly
“enclosed, not exposed!” Many people consider
their faith a very private and personal
matter, characterized by a kind of spiritual
confidentiality. Jesus, on the other hand,
called his followers “the light of the world,”
and told them not to hide their light under a
bushel but to put it on a stand, where
everyone could see it.
Unfortunately, some forms
of aggressive style of evangelism can
discourage people from openly sharing about
the Lord. Such methods often help Christians
overcome timidity, but, unfortunately, they
can also produce a bombastic, programmed, or
insensitive style of evangelism.
A young Christian once
told me about his involvement with this type
of evangelism. He had carefully rehearsed a
series of fifteen questions and responses
designed to bring people to a choice for
salvation. After being well drilled in the
method, he successfully bulldozed his way over
a few random unbelievers until he encountered
an older man who was manifestly
non-churchgoing. Each Sunday after the local
church service, this man would pick up his
wife at the church. One morning the young
evangelist approached him and
straightforwardly posed the critical starter
question: “Mr. Adams, are you saved?” With
corresponding directness, the man inched up to
his face and shouted, “Shut up!” The flustered
young evangelist panicked, realizing that this
novel response had not been covered in the
evangelism training manual. His instincts told
him that he should approach this resistant
victim some other time, some other way (maybe
an anonymous note?).
The problems with many of
the aggressive, programmed techniques are only
too obvious. These approaches are artificial
and often on a one-time-only basis, with
random contacts. When we use them on those
with whom we have ongoing contact, we know
that we will probably alienate them for good.
A wise Christian will find many natural
opportunities for witnessing to co-workers,
neighbors, fellow students, and friends.
Even slight familiarity
with aggressive and insensitive techniques can
dampen our enthusiasms for evangelism.
Unfortunately, some Christians have reacted to
this pushy style of evangelism by deciding to
let their actions be their only witness for
the Lord.
We must recognize that
this witness of good deeds, though essential,
is not enough for personal evangelism. The
story of Robert helps illustrate this.
In the midst of an
intense executive lifestyle, Robert
experienced a profound change of life (a
personal conversion) on a retreat weekend. His
co-workers and subordinates noticed the
difference immediately. Outbursts of anger,
impatience, and cursing no longer punctuated
his behavior. Instead, he displayed
uncharacteristic contentment and patience in
the face of pressing responsibilities.
Robert told no one about
his religious experience, though he was now
attending prayer meetings and avidly reading
the Bible. Nevertheless, his change of
behavior was intriguing, particularly to Pete,
an accountant in the office.
Pete was so impressed by
Robert’s new-found reservoir of willpower that
he tried to emulate Robert’s model behavior –
only to fail miserably.
About a year-and-a-half
later, Pete was invited to the same kind of
retreat weekend that had changed Robert’s
life. As a matter of fact, Robert was now a
team member, leading discussion groups. To his
surprise, Pete discovered the source of
Robert’s changed life. His immediate challenge
to Robert was: “Why didn’t you tell me about
all this a long time ago? I would have given
my life to God more than a year ago!”
Though his behavior was
outstanding, Robert’s failure to actually talk
about what had happened to him short-circuited
any evangelistic fruit he might have borne.
After Pete’s input, he decided to be more open
about his Christian life. As a result, more
fellow workers were influenced toward the
kingdom of God.
The decision to be open
about our Christian lives will, indeed, result
in opportunities we would otherwise miss.
Perhaps the best way to be open is in response
to the needs and interests of others. That way
we can customize the gospel for each person in
order to make it most attractive.
Bill and Carol, for
instance, live in a neighborhood on the
outskirts of a major metropolitan area. Many
of their neighbors are younger couples with
small families. More than a few of the
families have been torn apart by divorce.
Other couples are struggling. As with many
people, happy, successful family life seems to
be escaping many of Bill and Carol’s
neighbors.
In contrast, Bill and
Carol are succeeding quite well in raising
their three children. As they consider how to
evangelize their neighbors, it is clear to
them that building a solid family life is a
strongly felt need among their neighbors. As a
matter of fact, a number of wives in the
neighborhood complimented Carol on the
behavior of her children. These comments have
provided Carol with several opportunities to
talk about the Christian approach to strong
family life. Since she has identified herself
as a Christian, the topic of Christianity and
home life comes up naturally in her casual
conversations with other neighborhood women.
This has a slow, but steady influence in the
neighborhood.
Bill and Carol have found
an ideal opening for spreading the gospel in
their neighborhood. They have been able to
speak of their Christian lifestyle without
cramming a spiritual message down anyone’s
throat. They have responded to the real
concerns of their neighbors and established
their own reputation as Christians. Their
openness makes it easier for them to share and
easier for others to relate to them. Though
they have not yet won any converts they have
managed to create a good deal of interest in
their Christian faith. Some of their neighbors
have begun to seriously evaluate their own
family life. With this foundation, Bill and
Carol can now decide on a more purposeful
approach. They can focus on two of the most
responsive couples, perhaps suggesting a four
session group discussion on family life, based
on the teachings of Scripture.
This kind of customizing
of the gospel according to the needs and
interests of those around us is particularly
helpful. The more prayerfully we can consider
people’s needs, the better able we will be to
evangelize them. What do people talk about?
How do they spend their time and money? What
kinds of friends do they have? What motivates
them? Asking these kinds of questions about
people we see in an ongoing way is
particularly important. By doing so, we
minimize the chance of spoiling our witness
through hasty or compulsive openness. It is
not always wise to declare our spiritual
colors at the outset of a relationship.
Even so, identifying
ourselves as Christians is a fundamental and
natural way of being open about our
Christianity. In personal evangelism it is
usually wise to give people time to adjust to
the knowledge that we are Christians, rather
than immediately launching into an explanation
of the gospel message. If we begin by
identifying ourselves as Christians, we will
find that we have many opportunities later on
to explain how we came to the point of
commitment to Christ.
We can communicate the
fact of our personal Christian commitment in
any number of ways. Whatever we do, our
identity as Christians should be communicated
naturally, rather than as a stark or sudden
statement of faith.
Sharing Our Experience
One of the best ways to
tell others about God’s love is by telling
them our own experience of God at work in our
lives. I often tell people about a remarkable
series of jobs that the Lord has provided for
me throughout the years. Natural circumstances
have also provided me with the chance to tell
others what God has done in my life after I
was prayed with for a fuller release of the
Holy Spirit. When we share on a personal
level, about concrete situations, we
straightforwardly attest to God’s love.
Moreover, being personal can encourage the
hearer to be personal with us.
Conversely, doctrinal
discussion nearly always generates debate,
which is not usually helpful in personal
evangelism. Generally, we should avoid is.
This lesson was reinforced when I shared my
faith with a man from India. The discussion
began quite cordially about some theological
differences between Christianity and Hinduism.
But in a mere fifteen minutes we were
literally nose to nose; he was shouting, his
neck veins bulging!: “Jesus Christ is only a
man!” At that point, I sensitively detected
that our conversation had lost its former
sweetness. I suspect our doctrinal encounter
served only to enflame my friend’s nominal
Hinduism to a newfound fervor.
When we talk about our
relationship with Jesus, we should share
personally and naturally. We should be
ourselves as much as possible. Recently I read
an article attesting to the effectiveness of
the common earthworm as the best fishing bait
available, better even than all the
scientifically developed artificial lures in
existence. Perhaps you can anticipate my
point. We need not manipulate people or
situations artificially. Evangelism happens
best when we simply make use of the natural
opportunities the Lord gives us. If we are
open and aware, we will recognize the
opportunities given us by the Holy Spirit.
Offering a Christian
Perspective
Imagine that you are
discussing the problem of political corruption
with your barber. You might offer an
observation like the following: “You know,
Bill, it amazes me how widespread graft and
bribery are, but I think the problem must go
deeper. After all, deception and greed have
been around since the human race began. All of
us have been tempted, and some of us have even
given in to the temptation to take advantage
of others. Don’t you think we need a bigger,
more basic solution?” This kind of approach is
much more helpful than stark, dogmatic, or
pious statements like “Well, the Bible says
that all ‘have sinned and fall short of the
glory of God.’” Our comments should be
designed to continue, not end, discussion.
Normally, our remarks need not be explicitly
religious, but they should reveal an
underlying Christian perspective. For
instance, to a problem at work you might
respond: “The problem in our department
involves more than just ignoring procedures.
We all tend to gossip rather than to deal
directly with the people involved.”
Talking Freely about
Christian Activities or Friends
When co-workers tell how
they spent their weekend, it is natural to
respond in kind. We can mention that we joined
three other families for a picnic and canoe
ride after church. It is good to be open about
the fact that some of our activities are
explicitly Christian. This is particularly the
case if we are asked a question that can only
be honestly answered by revealing that we were
engaged in a spiritual activity – “what did
you do last night, Mary?” “Actually, after
dinner my husband and I went to a very
interesting lecture.” “Really, what was it
about?” “A local author spoke at our church
about how television can undermine family
life. Did you know that the average American
family spends twice as much time watching TV
rather than relating to each other directly?”
We can share
straightforwardly about our Christian
activities in a way that is not pushy.
Discussion can be prolonged describing the
content of the activity or its effect on us:
“To tell you the truth, I was exhausted and
crabby after dinner last night. The last think
I wanted to do was to go to a prayer
meeting. But by the end of the night, I
was glad I had gone. I felt refreshed by the
music and the contact with other people. I
slept well and feel great today.”
The Christian activities
that we tell others about or invite them to
should be described sensitively and wisely. We
should not go into too much detail describing
things that would be unappealing or mysterious
to a non-Christian. (“Oh, it was great! We
interceded for two straight hours before our
testimony and scripture witness.”) Neither
should we make it seem that we are so involved
in Christian activities that we have no time
for anything else. A non-Christian is not
usually attracted to the idea of spending much
time in such activities.
I have often heard
Christians say, “I don’t know anyone to
evangelize.” This comment reminds me of a
missionary who was bound for an overseas
mission. He was traveling on a huge ship which
was transporting about two hundred other
missionaries and two hundred tourists. As he
considered the ration of missionary to
tourist, and the abundance of leisure time to
socialize, he became excited about the
potential of in-transit conversions. To his
chagrin, however, he discovered that none of
the other missionaries had even considered
evangelizing the tourists. When he approached
his fellow laborers about this, they were
surprised at such a novel idea. They were
thinking only of the foreign missionary field.
Taking stock of our daily
relationships is an invaluable step in
personal evangelism. Most of us have regular
relationships with neighbors, merchants,
relatives, friends, co-workers, and
schoolmates. This is not to mention numerous
random, short-term contacts that punctuate our
daily routines. Praying and considering with
whom and how we can effectively share about
our faith sharpens our ability to be Christ’s
ambassadors right where we are.
[This
article is adapted from the book, Person
to Person: How to be effective in
evangelism, © 1984 by Jim Berlucchi,
and published by Servants Books, Ann
Arbor.]
See related
article on Personal Evangelism
.
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Jim Berlucchi is the
Executive Director at Spitzer
Center for Ethical Leadership.
He formerly served as the Executive
Director of Legatus, an
international association of
Catholic CEOs. He is the work/life
columnist for Faith
Magazine, and a published
composer and recording artist.
Sample audio
clips of his music are
available online.
He served for many years as a
community leader in The Word of God
and The Sword of the Spirit.He and
his wife Judy reside in Dexter,
Michigan, USA. They are the grateful
parents of eight children and enjoy
a steadily increasing number of
grandchildren. |
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